Anxiety: the sum of all your fears

Flickr. Neil.Moralee

 

Fearful speaking in front of others?

First find out the reason why you are nervous. Then get rid of that reason.

Here is a catalog of the possible reasons, and remember, more than one reason may apply: anxiety is the sum of all your fears.

  • Fear of not being prepared. you had too little time to get ready, you rushed through the preparation, you had no time to rehearse. you finished your slides the morning of the event and you don’t remember how many layers are on some slides so you have to look at them to know when the slide changes, etc…  There is no substitute for preparation.  It encompasses so much more than rehearsing (Presentation traps 9 – the rehearsal traps). You can’t wing it, Mr Icarus, because the heat of the moment will burn the wax that loosely ties your wings to your body. Sorry.
  • Fear of being the center of attention. Of course you are. They came to you because you have something they need. That’s why they are looking at you. So please, turn your marine binoculars around a second, what do you see? People have  shrunk to a size where you can see them all. They are all in the same boat. You’re the captain of the boat and they are your passengers. They have boarded your ship, and they will disembark after your talk. They are your temporary guests and you want to make sure they enjoy the journey. Show you are worth your stripes, and beam that captain smile of yours to inspire confidence in you. You know how to behave like a host, don’t you? Surely you have hosted friends and colleagues at home. Behave like a host, whose relaxed attitude comes from expertise and preparedness.
  • Fear of being evaluated by boss, peers, or subordinates. So your boss and employees are in the room attending your talk. Is that why you have to behave like Wonder Woman or Superman? The way you see it, any fragility will be a subject of later mockery. Any error will topple the statuesque figure you have worked so much to hoist onto the pedestal. But the Superman costume only fits Christopher Reeve. And the Wonder Woman suit was tailored for Linda Carter, so leave it on the rack. You are frail, you are human, you may make mistakes, but the stress caused by the acute awareness of potential mistakes brings on fear more surely than losing the jackpot. Get your boss and your employees out of your system. For example, rehearse in front of them prior to your talk. Involve them in the process. They will learn that you have gone through great pains to make your presentation a success, and they probably will give you useful feedback in the process. Otherwise, any mistake in your talk will make you crash and burn, never to regain your composure. And by the way, these mistakes you think all have surely noticed, they have probably gone unnoticed.  So there is no need to point them out during your talk!
  • Fear of loosing too much if you fail. Money, career, prestige, you name your poison. For it is your poison if it is so addictive that you turn to excipients to boost your confidence, or you let your fear pay allegiance to these monsters. Remember the book of Ecclesiastes: it is all vanity, and vanity is for the bonfire.
  • Fear of looking awful. Yes you do look awful… if you say so, since, as Pascal pointed out, “The perceptions of our senses are always right”. So what? Has your science anything to do with the length of your nose? The buckling of your legs? The gap in your teeth? The color of your shoes? The size of your belt? Is the audience attending your talk with the specific intent to be repulsed because your reputation as a frankenstein exceeds that of Boris Karloff? So stop that nonsense and focus on your objective of helping others with their scientific problems. Do not focus on self-perceived crimes against the self-perceived canons of prettiness or handsomeness, because, besides grooming, there is nothing you can do to improve your native look, but there is much you can do to make yourself attractive to others by your scientific talent and expertise.
  • Fear of questions. I see. You fear not having a ready answer, or a convincing answer. Yet you did the research, the audience did not. You conducted the experiments, chose the most adequate methods, carefully selected the data. From the data, you analytically excised the supportive evidence that warrants your conclusions, and you tentatively proposed your inner convictions in gut-spilling tables and figures. The audience did not. And if some questions seek yes or no statements, it is not to trick you; it often is to assess the usefulness of your findings and how well they would apply to people’s problems. In a way, their questions invite you to their research turf. If you work on the same turf, your fears are groundless. You are the expert. If their turf is different, you simply do not know. And it is fine to say so without feeling embarrassed. Scientific embarrassment is being caught cheating, or not being able to justify choices (data, method, or conclusions). Only then, is there reason to be afraid of questions. But since you are fully accountable, it is not the case for you. So any fear is misguided, particularly the unreasonable fear of having to say “I don’t know”. Next time you have to say “I don’t know”, finish that sentence with what you do know that is related to the question with something like “This we don’t know; However, we do know that…“. You will be seen as helpful instead of ignorant.

In conclusion, analyze your fear. You will learn much about yourself and, with that, you will find the way to master your nerves.